Tea With a Mad Girl

7 am
cold
wind and snow
hands curled in mittens
late late late

7:23
screaming brakes
2 tickets
warmth

7:30
overcrowded
claustrophobic
hope to get a seat
walkmans and newspapers abound

7:45
bing

cold again

didn’t die today

the knife was just too dull
or perhaps I was

there weren’t enough pills
at least I coulcn’t find them

my rope wasn’t long enough
or maybe I’m too short

doesn’t matter
same end result

Once I saw two dreamers
sitting on a sandy beach,
I wanted touch their hands, their faces
but my hands would not reach
so, instead, I spoke to them
and asked them to explain
the dreams that we dream
and how they bring us pain

“Pain?” one laughed
as I sat down
“dreams are full of joy
and cheer and circus clowns!
they teach us
the value of each day
so we do not sit
and simply waste away.”

Well I got up,
and taking his advice
I ran off, wanting
to live my life
And you know something?
he was right
I enjoy each day
as I dream at night

seas of tears
on sandy shores
written fears
on plate-glass doors
chess players
fallen in pain
rainbowed layers
seen in the rain
broken hearts
shattered dreams
blown apart
torn at the seams

scarlet dewdrops
lit by moonbeams
blood falls in beads
on broken dreams
salt tears land on
sad window sills
strange sorrow
cold winter chills
why do I fear
to face this love
secrets lost to
the stars above

pretty? pretty is not here
pretty is gone?
am i to be with him?
i cannot i am dead
bloody soul black mourning
o white morning
in whence the end do pass
pass us by but for pretty
soft heart, my pretty, and soft tongue
breathe for the voice that will not come
does it own you, or you, it?
black cloth does mark the change
woe betide, my sugar self
lay our broken pieces down
scream to bleed and bleed to die
die to live again
o pretty i am sad at you
and unfilled within a lie
o pretty i can hardly speak
my voice knows not the words
o pretty pretty stars at night
and a darling moon
make way for pretty sunrise
morning love of life
tomorrow is no future
it only lasts one day
yesterday is all that’s passed
even the dead ones
dead dead, o pretty, not dead
just hurt in the passing
to another bed

I.
open your eyes and see the world
the heartlessness of life unkind
awakens you, and you arise
with what tattered dreams that are left behind
do you even know what you are doing?
you tell the sun not to shine
but it doesn’t care what you say
it simply thinks you lost your mind
and I simply have to agree
you’d do the same, if so inclined

II.
does the sun cry each morn
at the breaking of the day?
where would the river run
if it were to lose it’s way?
if the clouds would turn purple
would the sky be aquamarine?
and although life-devouring time end
would anyone know what it mean?

III.
is there a single ray of sun
hidden in the cloudy, dark grey sky
why do tears come fast
to those who must not cry
all of the evil in the world
is there a reason why
stop the endless cycle of pain
will no one ever try
when all things seem hopeless
should one just quit and die

they said that time was over
they said those days were gone
they said all men were equal
what they said was wrong

we just want to be free
from endless prosecution
but because of our beliefs
we faced execution

they said that we were bad
and played with evil spells
stealing children. killing crop
poisoning the drinkning wells

they accused us of these deeds
told us to repent our mistake
the innocent were proven guilty
and burned upon the stake

now, years later, they all say
the burning times are gone
but we still feel discrimination
and we know we are not wrong

thorns of hatred upon his brow
blood flows like sweat from his forehead
his five wounds form a blessed star
scarlet love flows down from his wrists
a single nail retains his feet
pure forgiveness from him who dies
how great his love, this child of the world
given to life to take to death
‘father forgive them they do not
know what they’ve done’ famous last words
ideal of love, forgive us all
for our hatred
mother, father, your children pray
let us learn love like this pure soul